...pretty little pills...
Drewcifer posted this at 8:16 PM.
Monday, July 05, 2004
Uhhh...
Maybe I should learn to communicate better.
I'm sure something will pop into my head at some point...
Drewcifer posted this at 4:15 PM.
Saturday, July 03, 2004
It's so great that we have concerned citizens in the US
In fact, I just got this lovely letter in the mail today. It's good to see people with enough respect for the President to write a letter of support.
We need more citizens like that and less like that Anti-Jesus, pro-vote counting fucktard Patrick Leahy.
Drewcifer posted this at 7:15 PM.
Tuesday, June 22, 2004
I'm George Duhbya Bush, bitch...
Poppy's old boss finally kicked the bucket recently. Hopefully I can ride the media wave of Saint Reagan to re-election. Everybody calls Ronald Reagan "The Great Communicator", and hopefully the voters will see me as the same. I mean, I can talk good also.
I just hope Ol' Ronnie isn't looking up from hell and throwing bad mojo on me. I can't afford anymore bad vibes coming my way.
Drewcifer posted this at 2:26 AM.
Monday, May 24, 2004
I don't care what anyone says....
I fell off that dang bike and it had nothing to do at all with me yelling at Laura and then tripping on the carpet.
Geez...I was celebrating Jenna graduating college. Who woulda guessed that would have happened? I have another daughter, right? What in the green hell has that other one done for me lately???
I need some more money in my re-election funds. That's what Karl and Uncle Dick say.
If they'd let me speak for myself, I'd tell the world my idea of my re-election theme:
I'm George W. Bush, bitch
Shit, I have November locked up. Poppy won the Iraq war in '91 and lost to Clinton. I'm losing the Iraq war in '04, but I have the election fixed anyway (or so I'm promised). Things are gonna get ugly.
Thank Jesus for a thing called VOTER APATHY...
Drewcifer posted this at 4:59 AM.
Sunday, April 04, 2004
John Kerry has no right being President!
He's a flip-flopper. America won't stand for people who flip-flop on their own decisions.
Drewcifer posted this at 7:58 AM.
Tuesday, February 17, 2004
These allegations are false!
I may have engaged in some homo-erotic ativities while I was in skull 'n bones, and I might be guilty of knocking up that skank in Texas and paying for her abotion while abortion was still illegal...
But I have never, EVER fucked a goat.
Besides, America has real issues to deal with. Issues like Janet Jackson's boobie being shown on live TV. That's the main problem in America. Ashcroft and I were just talking about that the other day. We both agreed that if there's going to be a woman exposing her jahoobies on network TV, then it should be a white woman. Like LeeAnn Rimes.
I think some people just got too uppity. It's just been a wierd week or two like that.
Drewcifer posted this at 3:13 AM.
Saturday, January 17, 2004
If I wasn't running for President....
I'd totally vote for this guy.
But I really have dick to worry about, right?
I mean, this guy is what? A Four-Star General? So what? How many of our troops died under General Clark's command? The best thing this guy ever did was rescue some white Euro-trash from some other of the same type.
Shit... General Clark wants to challenge me on militaristic matters?
I think my record speaks for itself.
Drewcifer posted this at 2:15 AM.
Thursday, January 15, 2004
We may have to go to CODE ORANGE again...
I've got a sneaking suspicion that there might be another plane crash.
Maybe even two plane crashes.
Jesus...where's Andy with those burgers?
Drewcifer posted this at 2:49 AM.
Sunday, January 04, 2004
They hate us because they envy our freedom.
That's why we are giving them more freedom in Iraq. Slowly but surely, we're winning the Iraqi's hearts and minds, one bullet at a time. Or so Rummy tells me anyway.
Hell yeah! What we're doing is awesome!
Drewcifer posted this at 2:56 AM.
Thursday, January 01, 2004
SHIT!!!
Someone just pointed out to me something....
Wesley Clark was the NATO Commander when my predecessorwas in office. Somebody better warn America what these people are all about before someone starts calling this guy an American Hero.
Note to self: have Unka Dick check into flight plans on Clark and Dean...
Drewcifer posted this at 4:37 AM.
WHEW!!!
Shit, I made it to Twenty-oh-four, and life is good!!
Honestly, I have no clue what went on in '03, but who cares, right? Apparently there's some lawsuit agaist me. Like I care about what happened in '01. (Actually, I keep mentioning Nine-One-One in speeches...I wish someone would tell me what that's all about.)
But like Tommy-boy Ridge said, no terrorist attacks on New Years Eve means we did good! We upped that alert thing and made sure no terrorists bombed anybody here in the US. Damn, we're good!
All I gotta do at this point is play the war hero thing that I've been doing. I mean, seriously...who out there can match my wartime heroics? Shit...Nobody...as far as I know...
If there were ever a General to send troops into a battle situation and not lose a single one...shit, I'd vote for him too.
Drewcifer posted this at 4:21 AM.
